Being blessed with a wonderful career in the software industry does not mean it was easy or that no mistakes were made…
On the contrary, I have made plenty of mistakes!
The good news is that, so far, everything has mostly worked out.
However, if I had the chance, there are definitely a few things I would like to go back and suggest to my younger self to help make my career path a little bit smoother.
As I’ve previously written with “Iterative Interviewing“, I believe that life and career are not about NOT making mistakes. Instead, the key is to learn from mistakes to grow and evolve into something even better. Iterate!
So, if I could, here’s the professional advice I would share with my teenage self:
Greetings from the future – the year 2023!
First, no worries! Everything is good and you will have so many wonderful people and happenings in your life. It will be much different than what you currently expect, but remember to enjoy the journey and keep your positive attitude about yourself, your family, your friends, and your colleagues.
Next, your love of computers is AWESOME for your career! That Apple IIc that Mom and Dad just bought for you and your brother Eric was such a great investment. The tech industry will grow (and will it grow!), which means you will be able to make a successful career out of working with computers and software, the things you already love! Pretty awesome!
All that being said, there are some words of advice I, your future self, would like to share with you that could help you avoid a few bumps along the way:
1. Go Out to Lunch!
You will start your career with the idea that your work world and your personal social world should be kept completely separate. Maybe all of those HR videos about being really careful or whatever scared you. Or maybe it was the fact that you’ve lived in 10 different places and you’ve always been good at making friends… just not as good as getting close to people.
Get over it! Get to know your colleagues! When it comes down to it, you will have so much in common with the people you work with throughout your career. At the least, you have common interests (software!). These are the people you will know as you all grow up, have families, build careers, and more. You care about them… so why keep them so separate? Go out for drinks! Learn about their interests, their families, their hopes, and their challenges. Even invite them and their families over to dinner once in a while! Maybe you can help each other along the way?
This will later be one of your biggest professional regrets – it’s good to have friends! Start making them now with the people around you – even at work.
2. Don’t Say No to Offers!
Even if you are perfectly happy where you are, don’t say no when someone reaches out with a job opportunity. Take the time to understand and explore: You might be pleasantly surprised by a wonderful new career option. The offer may even come at a time when your current company seems to be awesome or is finally on the cusp of something big – like going public! However, you should always take the call, and have the conversation. It can’t hurt to at least explore other opportunities, especially when people are reaching out to you about them.
3. It’s Okay to Look!
Just like it’s good to be open to opportunities, it’s also perfectly acceptable to proactively look around. Unlike in your romantic relationships, it’s fine to keep your eyes open for other career opportunities. The good news is that you will really enjoy being on most of the teams at most of the companies across your career. However, it’s important to remember your own career growth even if it means leaving a comfortable position with a good company. Don’t feel guilty about looking around now and again for other potential career opportunities. It’s just the way the business world works. You are the CEO of yourself and are responsible for navigating your own path.
4. Timing: Be Patient at Times / Impatient at Others
Sorry, this one is hard because it totally depends on the situation and is therefore confusing. My advice here is that if everything seems right and good, then it’s fine to stay where you are. However, if the writing is on the wall, promises have been repeatedly made and then broken, and/or you don’t see a clear and happy path forward, get out! Trust your instincts: Don’t become a boiled frog – It’s best to realize quickly that someone has moved your cheese! There’s a big world out there and it’s better to be somewhere else than in a place that isn’t right. There’s an opportunity cost to not moving – and you can also get stuck in a sunk-cost fallacy that will later take precious time to resolve.
5. It’s Not About Doors that Close, It’s About the Doors that Open
The upcoming college admissions process will be the first time in your professional life that you will experience a closed door. However, you will also learn that the people around you will continue to love and support you even when a door closes. Yes, it will hurt, but you will soon have other opportunities that will lead to exciting new experiences. Very few people in the world have doors open for them all the time. It’s not about getting rejected – EVERYONE GETS A “NO” AT SOME POINT! Instead, life and character are about what you do when you are challenged – how you respond and keep yourself going is the true measure of yourself. Eventually, a beautiful new door will open and you will be on your way again.
By the Way: Go Army! But, your upcoming decision to not go to West Point is the right one for you: You looked at yourself and realized that following in the footsteps of your father was not your path (and you will soon learn about the psychology of Identity Foreclosure, and how it almost related to you.)
Bottom line: I am proud of you now and know that you will make some great choices along the way. I hope my hard-earned advice will makes things even better for you.
Ad Astra!
John
PS – We haven’t made it to Mars yet, but we are getting closer!
